"We must not wish anything other than what happens from moment to moment, all the while, however, exercising ourselves in goodness. And to refuse to exercise oneself in goodness, and to insist upon simply awaiting what God might send, would be simply to tempt God."
— St. Catherine of Genoa
Today’s musings are generated entirely by reflection on this
quote of St. Catherine of Genoa. Some information about the life of St.
Catherine of Genoa will also help with perspective. I like knowing a little bit
about the woman or man behind the words. Many quotes - this one included - can
stand on their own two feet for sure! But knowing who is behind it can lend a
deeper credibility to what they have to say.
A saint of the fifteenth century, Catherine was born into a
noble Italian family. Though she sought religious life as a young teenager, she
was denied because of her age. When her father died, she married at the age of
16 according to her parents’ wishes. But the marriage was terribly miserable
for Catherine and she suffered for ten years with her faithless, mean-tempered,
excessive money-spending husband. During a time she went to the church for
confession, Catherine had an overwhelming mystical experience of God’s love and
she experienced a deep conversion. Her life became profoundly focused on God
and she immersed herself in frequent prayer, Holy Communion, and care for the
sick. She is especially known for tending the sick during the two seasons of
the plague that swept across Italy. Catherine’s husband joined her in her work
after he too experienced a conversion. Due to the effects of his prior ruthless
spending habits, they were in severe financial distress. They moved into the hospital
where they cared for the sick and eventually managed the hospital. Toward the
end of her life, Catherine explained to her spiritual director her mystical
experiences throughout her devoted relationship with God. He complied her memoirs,
and her many experiences and writings are of great insight to this day. And so
we have this insight from her (repeating the quote):"We must not wish
anything other than what happens from moment to moment, all the while, however,
exercising ourselves in goodness. And to refuse to exercise oneself in
goodness, and to insist upon simply awaiting what God might send, would be
simply to tempt God."
It took me a few times reading it over to grasp what she was
saying… and it’s worth expounding upon. The whole point is to live in the
present moment. And that we shouldn’t wish for anything other than what God has
permitted or willed to be in that moment, and - in every moment - to ‘exercise ourselves in goodness’. Each moment is
an opportunity – an opportunity to live
well. One moment to the next can be vastly different, but we are called in
each moment to act in goodness.
What is goodness? Goodness, as defined by the Oxford
dictionary, is: “the quality of being morally good or virtuous.” Goodness =
virtue. In each moment, we are called to act virtuously. This is the Christian
life.
The second sentence of her quote is where the cream of the
crop is. We have moments (or seasons) of our lives that we don’t understand,
where we feel as if we are waiting on God to respond to a petition we have, and
this can make not wishing 'anything other than what happens from moment to
moment' extremely difficult. But Catherine tells us that we still must practice
goodness, to practice virtue, for the moment. And that to refuse to do so, and to just wait on God without heeding the
opportunity to practice virtue in each moment, is simply ‘to tempt God.’ We can
be prone to waiting on God with a sort of sensationalist, expectant attitude,
and a kind of stubborn, crossed-arms disposition of the heart. When we do this,
we focus on what we want to see or experience in a future moment, and we lose the opportunity to act with goodness
(virtue) in the moment we are in. Of course, this is absolutely NOT to say that
we shouldn’t petition God for the desires of our heart! We can and should
and even must do so. Jesus
Himself instructs us in this, "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and
you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you” (Matt 7:7).
We are encouraged further in the Epistles to pray to God
with our needs and desires (there would be too many citations to list of all
the places where prayer of petition is encouraged throughout scripture, but see
Philippians 4:6 & 1 Timothy 2:1 to start!). To pray in this way, is to live
in the moment, presenting to God what weighs on our soul in that moment, but
then, not simply insisting to wait upon Him, tempting Him to do what we want, but to go on – to go on living
well, acting in goodness, persevering in virtue.
A few tangible examples to envision: a couple who loses their
child, petitions God to ease their sadness and console them in their grief, but
then go out to serve the homeless at a soup kitchen – to live well, to act in
goodness. A woman suffering from a difficult marriage, prays to God for help,
and then goes to volunteer at a crisis pregnancy center. The man who lost his
job and fears for the livelihood of himself and his family, prays to God, and then
helps his wife clean the house, acting honorably, living virtuously. The
chronic illness that threatens one’s peace, the loneliness that can taunt those
who are single, widowed, or in nursing homes, the exhaustion that sweeps over
the busy mom with small children, even the small things like burning the toast
at breakfast, or forgetting to put the laundry in the dryer a day later (who’s
with me!?), every single moment presents an opportunity – to act with goodness.
To ask ourselves ‘how do I act with virtue right
now?’
This applies to the good moments too! To everything that
comes our way. In the moments that we feel especially loved, safe, happy,
healthy, grateful, rested, prayerful, appreciated, or motivated – how do we
exercise goodness in these times? To live those moments virtuously? Not with
excessive pride, or ruthless ambition, or insensitivity – but with humility,
patience, gratitude, and kindness.
What’s at the bottom of all this? What is the attitude,
disposition, and perspective that we need to have in order to put this into
practice, and really live well from moment to moment? TRUST. We have to trust
that in the hard times, the sad times, the good times, the happy times, and the
just plain busy times, God is taking care of us. To exercise goodness at all times,
and to strive after virtue, even in the course of ‘waiting’ on God for the cries
of our hearts, is to wait well, to trust Him, to grow, and to make ourselves
ready for the work of the Lord in our lives. The work of the Lord is fluid. It
is constantly moving and acting, so we’re never really waiting on God as if there’s ever a moment that He is not acting,
for He always is. And ultimately, what are we making ourselves ready for? The
moment when we’ll meet Him face to face. Everything in life is oriented to our
destiny, and we were all created for the destiny of union with God. The ‘exercise
of goodness’ in each day to day moment, is to strive after what we seek, is to make
ourselves more and more receptive to God’s work in our lives now, and ready for our destiny at the
moment He calls us home.
Saint Catherine had moments of joy and gladness and of deep
intimacy with God as she dedicated her life and her work to Him, committing
herself to prayer; but she also had moments of great trial, pain, and
suffering. And her perseverance in the love of God and neighbor, gave her the
wisdom to convey this truth to us… The quote one last time: “We must not wish
anything other than what happens from moment to moment, all the while, however,
exercising ourselves in goodness. And to refuse to exercise oneself in
goodness, and to insist upon simply awaiting what God might send, would be simply
to tempt God." All in all, we have to live in the moment – to live each
moment well, and practice goodness
(virtue) in all times and circumstances. And even if we feel like we’re
waiting, to continue exercising goodness – to live well anyway. To seek the highest good.
Lastly, a scripture verse comes to mind that I feel can
propel us a little here:
“You have been told, O mortal, what is good, and what the
Lord requires of you: Only to do justice and to love goodness, and to walk
humbly with your God!” (Micah 6:8)
Keep walking! Live well!
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